Was reminded today of an excellent, excellent story from a former employee:

He had been out drinking for the evening–perhaps drinking a bit too much–and badly needed to relieve himself. So, in true New York style, he turned onto a quiet street, walked to the side of a building, unzipped, and let loose.

As he peed away, he began to sober up slightly. Just enough, at first, to realize the wall he was peeing on was glass.

Then, just enough more to realize it was the glass wall of a restaurant. On the other side of which was a table for two, where the patrons sat shocked, mouths agape, as he blasted full-stream against the glass, right at face-level.

[Coda: Amazingly, he wasn’t ticketed for this. He was, however, ticketed a few months later for drunkenly urinating on the side of a police car. We never learn.]